christ666's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hold me closer tiny dancer I used to think about being alone, and being afraid of being alone. Afraid of getting my heart broken. When in truth, my heart was already broken...if to say I even had one. I think that I'm putting way to much into this, but at the same time...that's what I want. For the first time this morning, my guitar didn't fix anything. I tryed playing it. And it brought out these emotions in me that caused me to cry even more. I've cried to much in the past two days. And I won't stop. I'm not throwing up anymore. At least not right now. I think that someone believes that I can't talk to them. When I truth I'm longing for their help. But I can't just have her have something to stress over. She's got other things on her mind. She just got hired for next year. I think that's completely spectacular. Just like Kevin Spacey says. I also just feel like this is a problem that was meant for me and I'm the only one that can solve it. I think I actually have it figured out right now. And it's not what I expected it to be. But, I can't have Liz worry about my well being. Physically, I'm doing better. Emotionally, I'm getting there. I just bought the third season of Friends on DVD and I plan on watching that all night. I do feel lonely, but, at the same time. I don't. I don't feel loved, yet I do. Thank you to Spider-man, Penny, Sister, and Grace for all of the help while I was crying. I think that tonight, I won't have to hold a tissue to my cheek. Flower 4:50 p.m. - 2003-04-04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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