christ666's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- That Wind Is Calling My Name... I've failed to maintain my productivity while at work and consequently feel ashamed for it. A lot could have been done, but I let easy entertainment get the best of me. However, all it takes is another try. Today is me and my wife's four year anniversary since we started dating. First date, first hug, and first kiss. I'm hoping she doesn't remember or think about it today, because I'd like to get her a small gift to surprise her. I've been trying to be more proactive in celebrating how wonderful she is, and so far I've slightly followed through. I just need to push my self more, kiss her more, tell her I love her, make her feel sexy and wanted, and above all I want to make her feel appreciated. I think she's been somewhat impressed with me keeping myself busy with projects so there is some sense of pride that I take with that. It's not to say that it's been stale... or maybe it is. I guess, really, it's just been stressful with this whole court thing that we just finished and now we're looking for a new house. Saving money for Christmas gifts and bills and all that shit. Stress can take a toll, and I'm sure that fact is apparent. But now things are a bit more mellow and we can start looking up to some good things heading our way. I read some more entries back in 2004 and 2005 from this diary and it made me think a lot about the few fun times I had with the band I was in. Elegy. Funny... saying the name comes with a hint of shame, but a shame I embrace. Of course, back then I was on cloud nine, thinking I had tapped into some buried musical artist that I never new existed. Some of the lyrics to songs I had written and posted weren't necessarily awful, in my honest opinion. The others were downright terrible, but those few weren't bad. At least as far as lyrical content. When I think about those words applied to the music I had written to accompany them, I feel more resentful about my past self. Some of the songs I wrote I had completely forgotten about. It was a nice treat. I remember one fantastic moment was, I believe, in 2005. We had been trying to book a show at Moxie Java for some time and I had finally scored a small audition. I had met with a couple employees and played a Tripping Billies by my lonesome and they approved. As I love any hint of approval, this fueled my ego like crack ruins lives. We practiced a couple times, and I remember Becky saying she wasn't able to do the show. I remember being so pissed and not understanding the blow off. One of the violinists in the orchestra, Jennifer I think, said she'd do it, which worked out well. She was used to improving fiddle solos, which was a little astray from the violin stuff Becky would do. Jennifer had more of a country tone while Becky performed more Celtic style, believe it or not. But her jam skills matched enough to help the show. We also had Chadwick play drums for one song while sitting in my parent's old rocking chair, and sit doing nothing during the entire set until that song came. We hauled our stuff into the coffee shop, and one of the employees said, "I was hoping it was you guys tonight." (Approval! Squeeeeeeee!) We also ran into two females who were on their way out, who asked us what style of music we were. I remember saying something along the lines of crap or bullshit, but they didn't grasp I was joking. I told them it was good and they should come back and to my surprise, they did. In fact, the place was actually pretty full. A few people I had invited actually came, and plenty more that I hadn't counted on. I even remember Mr. Hauge coming with his family, probably just stopping for coffee, but upon seeing us perform choosing to stick around. I just remembered the guitar case with the word "TIPS" written in duct tape inside. Also jamming with our future drummer on a couple songs as well. That was a blast. Hmm... fun times. It would have been interesting if I had been more honest with myself and tried writing more original music. It seemed like some of the passion was there for the other guys, but not at all times. The band definitely suffered because of that, but... oh well. We did manage to record a full length demo which musically sounded great, but vocally sounded awful. I still can't remember where that CD is and I hope it's never found. I'd put my shitty high school metal band demos ahead of that trash. 5:12 a.m. - 2012-01-18 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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